Happy Birthday Sofi

Confession #1: my youngest middle child celebrated her birthday over a week ago, and although I intended to write this post in her honor on her birthday (like I did for her sister), time got away from me.  And so here we are, better late than never, right?  (Thank you to those of you nodding your head compassionately in agreement).


Confession #2: I have yet to write in or give the birthday girl her birthday card.  I bought one - it's very cute and has The Very Hungry Caterpillar on it.  But I have no idea where it is.  


Confession #3: I commit the aforementioned crime pretty much every year.  For whatever reason, I always manage to purchase, write a note in, and give a birthday card to my oldest daughter Isabel on her birthday.  And for whatever reason, I simply can't pull it together and do the same for Sofi.


So now you know the truth.  I am a failure in the birthday card department.  At least for Sofi.  Is there a support group for that?


On with the tribute...

Today several days ago we celebrated my daughter Sofi's 6th birthday.  Seeing as I told her she wasn't allowed to get any older than 4, I know that girl is trouble already ;)  In honor of her birthday, I am going to share with you my Top 10 Sofi-sisms.


What's a Sofi-ism, you ask?


Webster defines it as "A clever, quirky, or profound statement made by Sofi, often characterized by its ability to make the listener burst into laughter."


Ok, Webster didn't come up with that definition, I did.  But it is nonetheless accurate.  I compiled some of my favorite Sofi-isms over the years and put them into a book that we gave away for Christmas.  It's so hard to choose, but here are 10 of the best:


10. So there were these 10 men who were sick... I think they were called tigers... and they were on their way to see... I think he was called the emperor... and Jesus healed them and only one came running back. (age 3)


9.  Guevara is Spanish for Disco Dance (age 3).


8. Isabel: why do you always get to be the princess?  Sofi: because I don't make a very good servant.  You make a great servant (age 4).


7. Do you know what I'm attracted to?  I'm attracted to yaks! (age 4)


6.  I'm all about meat and God. (age 4)


5. It's only hopeless when you give up. (age 5)


6. Mom, are we doing that crack-pot today?  ~she meant crock pot~  (age 5)


5. Drinking a shake is like a teeth massage (age 5)


4. Alone shouldn't even be a word, because you're never alone.  God is always with you! (age 5)


3. (to Isabel): It doesn't matter how much money you have, it matters how much you give away.  (age 5)


2. You should never say never if forever is real.  (age 5)


1. We need to help people see themselves the way God sees them.  Because God never un-sees anybody.  He sees everyone!  (age 5)


I told you that girl is funny!  And wise beyond her years.  Her name means "wisdom" which suits her perfectly.


Confession #4:  The day I found out I was pregnant with Sofi was one of the most difficult days of my life.  This is very hard for me to admit out loud (or via internet waves).  It's one of those ugly little secrets I'd like to forget and not tell a soul.  Ever.  So if you're one of those perfect parents that jostles a whole herd of babies without breaking a sweat, please don't judge.  If you're one of those struggling parents who often feels overwhelmed, feel free to commiserate and read on because there's a happy ending.


Yes, I believed that every life was a gift, blah blah blah...  But I was barely holding things together, with a 6 month old who would scream for hours on end and refused to be put down for more then a millisecond.  We were strapped financially, the church that employed both Matt and I was struggling, excuses, excuses, excuses.  So rather than jump for joy over that positive pregnancy test, I burst into tears.  I can't tell you how deeply I regret that day and the days that followed, not for the changes they made in my life, but for the flaws they revealed in my character.  I wanted to be in control, I wanted my life to fit into this neat little plan filled with picket fences and the family dog and perfect children spaced 3 years apart.  So I wasted days and months and even a couple of years wallowing in a pity party over my ruined plans, and I'm not just talking about a positive pregnancy test here.  6 years later, and I'm not sure I would even recognize a single detail of my 5 year plan, let alone be able to check it off.  


6 years later, I couldn't care less.


Because if there's anything that having Sofi 14 months after I had her sister has taught me, it's that God's plans make my plans look ridiculous.  Hindsight being 20/20 and all that, I love having 2 kids so close in age.  In fact, if I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't change a thing.


My stinky attitude excluded.

Seriously, was she not the cutest little chubby baby ever? 

For those of you who weren't a part of my life 6 years ago, let me assure you that I got over my initial reaction and fell head over heels for that girl.  Other than a few forgotten birthday cards, she has not suffered from a lack of love or attention.  I tease her all the time that she wasn't a cuddly baby (unlike her sister, she was more than happy to be put down for many milliseconds at a time), but I held her and rocked her and smothered cuddled her until I made her a cuddly baby.  (By the way, now she's as cuddly as they come)  And I absolutely can't imagine my life without her.  She has this amazing imagination and when I get a glimpse at the world and life and people through her eyes it makes me want to just hang out with her until I can become just like her.  And oh, how that girl makes me laugh.  She is the funniest person I know (don't tell Matt - he likes to think he holds that title).


I tell Sofi all the time that she's my favorite surprise, and it's the truth.  She is a constant reminder to me that I am so much better off leaving the plans to God.  I haven't arrived yet, but I can honestly say that today, 6 years later, I have learned to embrace change as a blessing.  I have grown to look at the "surprises" that God sends my way as an exciting sign that there are better things to come.


So Happy Birthday Sofi.  I am so lucky to be your Mommy!

Nothing says "happy birthday" like a twinkle light tent ;)  Sweet dreams birthday girl!

(Not so) Good Friday

Being married to a pastor means that holidays are a little hectic.  Ok, a lot hectic.  I'm not complaining - there are many great things about being in ministry that far outweigh the bad.  But during church holidays (Christmas and Good Friday/Easter primarily), I'm pretty much a single mom.  On Good Friday, I was getting all 3 girls ready for church and things got a little out of hand totally crazy.  Like, some sensationalized episode of The Nanny kind of crazy.  Did I mention 3 girls?  That's 3 heads of hair to fancify and let me tell you, it's not easy.  Between the 3 of them, there is enough hair to rival Rapunzel.  (ok, slight exaggeration)  We had spent the day cooking and cleaning and all the kids pitched in.  We were hosting Easter at our house and for some crazy reason I got it in my head to do a "proper" Easter dinner, complete with China (which we dug out from under the stairs, unopened since we moved here.... 5 years ago!) and appetizers and side dishes and 3 pies for dessert.  Mmmmm.... I just love pie.  On top of my crazy notion of a "proper" Easter, I decided to do all the cooking.  Those of you who know me well, you can stop laughing.  Get back on whatever chair you just fell off of.  Yes, Matt does most all of the cooking in this house.  You know those helpless husbands whose wives have to leave them prepared meals in the fridge when they're gone to keep them from reverting to frozen pizza or cereal for dinner?  I'm that guy.  Only I'm a girl.  Which somehow seems so much more pathetic.  But I digress...


Fast forward a few hours, and it's time for Matt to leave for church.  We have a few hours to get everyone bathed, dressed and fabulous (remember, 3 girls) which is more than enough time.  I'm getting organized in my old age.  I swear to you, no sooner did the door close, and my previously angelic little girls turned into hellions.  Heads spinning, smoke coming from their nostrils and everything.  (ok, slight exaggeration again.  I'm a fan of hyperboles.)  Let me clarify that the tiny offenders were my biological children - our newest addition seems to have retained a healthy fear of getting into trouble.  Apparently I'm not scary enough to my older girls.  The next few hours were torture for all parties involved.  3 baths, 2 french braids and 1 gigantic headache later and the only Good thing about this Friday was the fact that it wouldn't come around for another year.  There was crying and eye rolling and arm folding and lots and lots of feet stomping.  I tried to keep it together - I was determined to fight the madness and not let the tiny rebels suck me into their battle, but they wore me down.  And before I knew it, I was yelling and threatening and acting like a crazy hellion myself.  Sigh...  


We managed to get ourselves into the car and as every buckled down in, it hit me.  Today is Good Friday.  Of course I knew this already, but sometimes it's the things we know most that we understand least.  Good Friday is the day our Savior died, taking our punishment and making eternal life with Him possible.  But what I forgot on that day was that Jesus died not just to absolve us from sin's punishment, but to free us from sin's power.  He didn't just bear the weight of our sins on that cross, He wrestled with that weight and came up victorious.  My Savior defeated sin so that it would never control me - His power, the same power that conquered Sin, lives in me. 


In that moment, I had 2 choices: I could silently pray for forgiveness and try to salvage the rest of the day or I could invite my children to pray with me, leading by example as I confessed my sins.  That's when I heard a still, small voice.  No, not God's - my daughter's.  Mom, can we start over?


Start over.  As if we had been forgiven, redeemed, justified.  It sounded like a perfect Good Friday solution.  So we talked about our day, confessed our sins, asked for forgiveness from each other and our Savior.  We talked about Jesus' death and resurrection and how He defeated Sin so it would no longer rule our lives.  And we attended Good Friday service together, with a newfound appreciation for what it meant.  After service as we headed home, Isabel asked me what their consequence was, and I had one of those rare moments where everything becomes clear and I knew exactly what God was doing in the hearts of my girls that day.  I talked about how Christ took our punishment on the cross - we deserved the greatest consequence, but Jesus stepped forward and offered to take it for us.  And while those of us who have only known a life with Christ often fail to grasp what we have been saved from, we need try.  We need to wrestle with and immerse ourselves in the idea of a Love so great that it would take our miserable, forsaken place, because only when we truly begin to understand that Love will we be able to celebrate the freedom it has brought us.  As much as I want my children to understand God's love, I know that He wants it for them so much more.  So I offered them the same gift He offers to us each day.


Freedom.  From sin and from it's consequences.  Some of you are catching on and yes, my answer to my daughter's question What's my consequence? was this: I'm not going to give you one.  Not because you don't deserve it, but because I want you - no, God wants you - to learn a lesson about forgiveness today.  This day, Good Friday, is the day that His Son took your punishment, and our sins were forgiven.  Then we went on to name the sins we had committed that day, and we pretended to put them on the cross.  By the end, Isabel was giggling, but not in a silly-1st-grader-up-past-her-bedtime sort of way. She was simply filled with joy - forgiveness will do that for you.  That child will carry the weight of the world around on her tiny shoulders, but in that moment she was able to put that weight on a very capable Savior.  


Fast forward to Easter morning (again, with the 3 girls and the hair and dresses and generalized fancifying).  Nothing went right that morning - there was an epic milk spill, the camera ran out of batteries, and we discovered one of those pesky theft-deterent tags (you know the ones that threaten to spew poisonous ink on you if you try to remove them) on one of the girl's Easter dresses.  But this time we were ready.  Armed and dangerous.  Sin had no hold on us, and thank God (literally) we made it out of the house without a meltdown.  


So now that Easter is over, don't stop celebrating.  Jesus is risen, and His work in us has just begun.  If we believe in Him, the power that raised Him from the dead is in us - so let's put that power to work.  Let us not leave Easter packed away until next year, our Savior didn't defeat death so that we could sing about it once (or twice) a year.  Death is conquered - let us rejoice, Sin is defeated - let us live as conquerors, Forgiveness is available to all who believe - let us embrace it and share it with the world.


Happy Easter.    


  

Recipe: The Perfect Spring Break

One of my favorite things about being a teacher (even if it's just part-time) is being able to enjoy each and every school holiday.  It's totally worth the depressing smaller paycheck to have the long and dreary monotony of a day-to-day schedule broken up by lazy holidays.  And I just love having my girls home and all to myself for a few days.  Sure, they drive me crazy with their ungodly incredible amounts of energy and the frequent bouts of squabbling and tattling (what is it with kids and the irresistible urge to heap trouble on their siblings?!).  But between the mayhem and conflict are beautiful moments where they are caught up in their imaginations and I can't help but grin like a crazy person as they roll around in fits of laughter or lose themselves in the world of Pretend... where anything is possible, as long as you have some free time and a few props - preferably ones with ruffles and sparkles and lots of accessories :)


This week Matt took some time off as well, and it's been a wonderful respite from what has been an insanely stressful couple of weeks.  We've had the chance to adjust to being a family of 5, and I feel like God has timed this mini-vacation so perfectly for us.  While I would love to be in some warm and tropical place right now, listening to waves rolling onto the shore and soaking up some sun, this week has been as perfect as a Mid-Western spring vacation can be.  So I've been making some mental notes, storing away in my forgetful brain all the things that make for a perfect Spring Break so I can repeat them all next year. Unless we end up in some warm and tropical place by some miracle, in which case I'll have to adjust.


Here's what I've come up with... (in no particular order, because it's Spring Break and I am anti-order)


 - Stay up late, whatever that is for you, getting lost in a good book or drowning out reality with some entertaining and completely unrealistic television.


- Sleep in late, whatever that is for you.  You'll have to train all members of your family for this mission.  Since our girls were 3, we've had a clock in their room and instructed them not to wake up until the clock reads (insert "late" number.)  They are free to fool us into thinking they are asleep when they are actually playing quietly in their beds.  Sofi figured out how to outsmart us at the age of 3 by setting the clock ahead 1 hour and bringing it to my room.  We duct taped the clock and nipped that right in the bud (girly is too smart for her own good!)  It also helps to have a husband who wakes up responsibly ridiculously early and doesn't mind corralling the children away from your room.  Which reminds me, I just love Matt like crazy!


 - Assuming you also love your husband like crazy, get a babysitter and go out!  We went to see Hunger Games.  It was fabulous.


- Do something fun and spontaneous and out of the ordinary - we decided to go ice skating.  Not a typical spring activity, but still fun.

 - Take naps.  If you are so inclined, invite one of your kids to join you.  For me personally, there is nothing more relaxing then snuggling up with one of your favorite little people and falling asleep in the middle of the day.  There is something about the sound of their breathing and their warm little selves all curled up next to me that is an instant de-stressor.  Providing they cooperate and actually sleep, of course.


 - Make some brownies and eat too many of them.  Brownies are my drug.  Feel free to replace with whatever works for you.  But brownies (with chocolate frosting) are the best.  Enlist your little helpers and don't forget to let them lick the batter (as if they'd let you).

 - Let the kids stay up late.  This will also help with the sleeping in.  There is something deliriously wonderful about forgetting what the clock says and just doing what you want when you want.


 - Send your kids on a scavenger hunt.  It requires minimal effort on your part, and what kid doesn't love a scavenger hunt.  I made a Rhyme Time hunt for the girls this morning and they were so excited.  Plus it was educational - bonus!

- Spend time with your girl friends.  There is something about a little grown-up-girl-time that is just fantastic.

 - Bring the kids over to grandma's.  Because every child deserves to be spoiled by someone who adores them unabashedly and because it's nice to hang out with your own mom, too. 


- Go on a picnic.  Preferably not when it's 45 degrees and windy, which is what we did.  Let your kids roll down a big hill and don't worry about grass stains or how it will feel to crash onto the gravel path below.  Kids are tougher than we often parent them to be.

I love the look on her face in this picture - is there anything more beautiful than a laughing child?

 - Have a balloon popping contest.  It's a great way to dispose of post-birthday balloon clutter and it's hilarious to watch the kids sitting/bouncing around on balloons while simultaneously trying to plug their ears.  I'm laughing just thinking about it.

 -  Don't make plans.  Instead, have loose ideas of what you could do, maybe, if you have the energy and the kiddos are being cooperative.

 - Take time to enjoy the little things - like a sunset, the fresh spring air, and the feel of your child's hand holding on to your own.  Don't you wish you could freeze moments like this?  


                                           




For those of you heading back to school and work this week - I hope you have a smooth re-entry! (ours was quite bumpy this morning, sigh...).  For those of you who haven't had spring break yet, I hope it's amazing!  And for those of you who don't get a spring break, my heartfelt condolences.  Just kidding!  There's always the weekend - why don't we treat them more like "mini Spring Breaks" and make the most of them?!


What is your recipe for the perfect spring break?  Please share your ideas with the rest of us!